Monday, September 26, 2016

Waning...

'Wane' implies a fading of that which has reached a peak of force , excellence. 

I believe everything like the moon, waxes and wanes...

Like when you wax the floor it gets brighter and more attractive;  the whole waxing process seems to be so positive. Theres growth, so there is joy. Theres joy, so there is learning. Theres learning, so there are achievements. And with achievements, I guess,  also comes the baggage of some attachments . 

Attachments in terms of memories and meaning. Somewhere unknowingly there could also be blend with the whole process of growth and one starts associating oneself with it. 
This association then gets a reason and an identity and somewhere becomes part of you. 

Does close association with people also make this process involuntary? The mother-child relationship, the husband - wife bond, a soul mate friendship.. do they all go through this phase? The feeling of moving forward, understanding oneself and going beyond all take you to such a happy space:) Life seems to be on the right track... 

But the lunar cycle cant be extended ... can it? The waning process cant be pushed forward.. can it? The joy of association cant be held on forever.. and the pain of disassociation cant be prolonged... can it???

How do you then handle the disassociation? What if the reason, meaning, of life start to shake? You know its going away from you. Do you try to supplement it with some other new relationship? Will there be a new growth? It might work for some.. 

But I doubt if it will for me.. When I close my eyes and dwell as in, what is it that is actually disassociating itself from me. I realise, after a whole turmoil of pain and sadness, that there actually is no disassociation. The relation , the memory, the meaning is become a part of me.. and its already transcending to someone/ something else that I continue to do in my life.. 

Grandparents, teachers, friends, relatives, children, all wax and wane with you in life, but I feel there is something of them that becomes part of you during that process and isnt that what continues to connect others who come along  in our remaining life?  


couple of lines from Tagores poem... 
The river runs swift with a a song, 
breaking through all barriers, 

But the mountains stays and remembers , 
and follows her with his love !